Suffering through the abuse of another is a warriors task. The opportunity to stand and come through the experience with integrity in tact. It is what it is. Life.
On Wednesday, December 12, 2012 8:51:53 AM UTC-5, archytas wrote:
-- On Wednesday, December 12, 2012 8:51:53 AM UTC-5, archytas wrote:
Remarkable what extent even abuse such as persistent shouting can
deform minds Molly. Our dog is a beast of peace. I wouldn't ask
obedience from him beyond keeping him safe. We used to demand such
from women. I wonder how this was resisted to the point no reasonable
man should expect it? And how we might learn more resistance to other
social-cultural inequality and the poor state of universal suffrage?
On Dec 12, 12:18 pm, Molly <mollyb...@gmail.com> wrote:
> My youngest had colic for more than six less than seven months, and I
> remember it well. He also came out full of energy and would run in circles
> around a room for the longest time. I filled it full of balloons once and
> he loved it, but was chastised by the doctor who was afraid he might break
> one and inhale it. We do what we must to keep the joy in difficult
> experience. I can tell you that now my 25 year old youngest son is a calm,
> wonderful, loving person who knows how to support the people he loves, inequality
> having felt so in his younger years.
>
> Sounds to me like you have the stuff of a wonderful dad, Ash. Life gives us
> experiences we cannot think our way through to teach us that the mind is
> not always necessary, and we are often the better for moving beyond it.
>
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> On Sunday, December 9, 2012 11:31:11 PM UTC-5, Ash wrote:
>
> > My last semester was rough, my older son is full of energy and mom had
> > to take a break. The first six months are pretty much blank, some people
> > called it a "colic" but for the longest time I just remember holding him
> > all night humming and rocking, up every two hours all night for a bottle
> > or comforting, then 'have to be to work in an hour' and get up from
> > sitting position on the couch, set him in the carseat and throw on
> > something lacking the wet spot in the lap (every night). The mind goes
> > to a different place when enduring, but despite being very passive and
> > thinking way too much I'm hardheaded as hell so all I said was, "Give it
> > time sweety, please don't make me choose, I'll do whatever it takes."
>
> > After a look at the therapy forum open on our other computer I decided
> > there were many things I just can't say. It's best to acknowledge my
> > failures with a measure of dignity. Perhaps I'm at an advantage having
> > no idea what it means to be a man. It has taken some time in study to
> > connect categorically with the species, and it has taken a bit more than
> > science, sociology, and psychology has offered.
>
> > Rigsy I hope you don't take my glacial speed personally, there's way too
> > much to sort out on this end. At least that is the safer 'stoic'
> > appearance to show. Which 'right reason'? From what I've seen it only
> > exists in territorial dominance (or hermetic orders :p ). Not sure what
> > type of contribution to the study this is Archy, but here it is.
>
> > On 12/6/2012 11:58 AM, archytas wrote:
> > > One possible resolution is to change our ideas on childcare. I'm not
> > > sure the focus has to be so much in the home. From the point of view
> > > of women and men wanting to have kids and look after them the system
> > > has lots of roadblocks - not least childcare and the times it is
> > > available (and cost). The big snag with creating decent lifestyles is
> > > one needs radical change and it's no use waiting for socialist utopia
> > > or robot heaven - which would be chimera anyway.
> > > Most of my students with young kids found it hard to start lectures at
> > > 9 a.m. or attend in the evening or the afternoon after 3 p.m. At the
> > > same time we had staff in the same position very good at slotting
> > > their timetables between 10 a.m. and 3 p.m. The provision of
> > > childcare was always 'under review' rather than a reality. The
> > > obvious answer is to get more flexibility and childcare in schools
> > > throughout the year. This is a non-starter in 'business reality'.
>
> > > On 6 Dec, 13:06, rigs<rigs...@gmail.com> wrote:
> > >> Which leads to over-compensation and a new prejudice often/sometimes.
> > >> My maternal history spanned biblicals but somehow I was able to be
> > >> mostly a stay-at-home mom which even the children were grateful for
> > >> and I hope to revive some of those skills with my grand-daughters as
> > >> change is on the way. I have truly missed family this last dozen
> > >> years. But I do see the additional stress on young women trying to
> > >> juggle all those "hats"- I even felt jealous of men dashing off to
> > >> their office when I had toddlers plus business on my mind.
>
> > >> On Dec 6, 4:24 am, archytas<nwte...@gmail.com> wrote:
>
> > >>> My own feeling on the work side of equality is we have to do too much
> > >>> of it and that there is, in fact, plenty of time in a 40 year work
> > >>> span for ten years off to deal with early child carrying and nurture
> > >>> (or alternatives). We are trying to establish equality in an already
> > >>> misunderstood and warped system.
>
> > >>> On 5 Dec, 00:39, rigs<rigs...@gmail.com> wrote:
>
> > >>>> Actually, where I am going to is economics and job creation since
> > >>>> women are now equal in western countries and have embraced working
> > >>>> outside the home or must be a co-bread-winner due to the cost of
> > >>>> living. Plus all must compete with the machine and technology or
> > >>>> competitive foreign labor. There are dozens of side issues such as
> > >>>> longer life spans, over-population, impact of financial and
> > government
> > >>>> mismanagement, etc.//I tend to view the two sexes as a reader/failed
> > >>>> writer- as types through history and am not very sentimental though
> > >>>> culture continues to send mixed messages even currently.//It's lovely
> > >>>> that you had such a positive experience with your own family despite
> > >>>> Tolstoy thinking happy families were all alike and possibly not
> > >>>> interesting to him as a writer. I think them fortunate although I
> > >>>> suppose there is a sense of quest and heroic attempts for those less
> > >>>> blessed that warms the soul.//Frankly, the Duchess is reminding me of
> > >>>> how ill I was with my first pregnancy with no tlc or hospital-
> > finally
> > >>>> my mother-in-law had to take charge. Also another thing- my kind
> > >>>> neighbor laughing he was glad he wasn't a woman after his daughter-in
> > >>>> law's very difficult/dangerous labor (over 2 days) and delivery.
> > Don't
> > >>>> worry- I bit my tongue.
>
> > >>>> On Dec 4, 4:11 am, archytas<nwte...@gmail.com> wrote:
>
> > >>>>> My Mum and elder sister were pretty strong characters and it never
> > >>>>> really crossed my mind to treat anyone with other than the respect I
> > >>>>> felt for them. I see where you re coming from rigs. The repression
> > >>>>> is ongoing in some minds and reality around the world. We are just
> > >>>>> changing our gender bias in 'heir to the throne rankings' so that
> > >>>>> female children get equal place. Quite why we haven't worked out
> > the
> > >>>>> real issue has nothing to do with gender and everything to do with
> > >>>>> throwing out the Royals I don't know. If the gender-free
> > inheritance
> > >>>>> rules had pertained 100 years before WW1 the British King in 1914
> > >>>>> would have been - er - Kaiser Wilhelm!
> > >>>>> There clearly are women's issues (men's, gays etc.) - and I doubt
> > they
> > >>>>> can or should be exclusively derived 'within gender' or sub-classes
> > -
> > >>>>> though this doesn't preclude groups talking the stuff through on
> > such
> > >>>>> a basis. I tend to think there has been progress, but I'm not sure
> > >>>>> how this has come about, if it has.
>
> > >>>>> On 4 Dec, 04:01, rigs<rigs...@gmail.com> wrote:
>
> > >>>>>> Thanks.// I think your reaction can be traced back to the time when
> > >>>>>> men were considered the main/only source of security so women were
> > >>>>>> more likely to protect that; it really is more complicated,
> > however.
> > >>>>>> Earlier homesteading and farming offered a different balance- a
> > very
> > >>>>>> important role for the female that gave her a natural or necessary
> > >>>>>> equality. But younger couples are working on a balance, as I see
> > it.//
> > >>>>>> Was going to bring Hesiod into the mix as he set out a horrid
> > >>>>>> description of females in the "Theogeny" (IX, 507-616), written in
> > 8
> > >>>>>> B.C.. I vaguely remember the professor saying he probably was an
> > ugly
> > >>>>>> farmer who was spurned by women so he took his revenge. But given
> > the
> > >>>>>> date, it is close to the Eden story. Another work came to mind
> > written
> > >>>>>> in the 1950's that I have poked around- "America As A Civilization"
> > by
> > >>>>>> Max Lerner- particularly Chapter VIII/Section 6- "The Ordeal of the
> > >>>>>> American Woman" which captures some of what I was looking for in
> > way
> > >>>>>> of explanation for my parent's generation. I think he captured it-
> > for
> > >>>>>> a man. :-)
>
> > >>>>>> On Dec 3, 8:34 am, archytas<nwte...@gmail.com> wrote:
>
> > >>>>>>> Your new account is off moderation rigsy. I've always been struck
> > >>>>>>> that women talking and acting for themselves are not reflected in
> > the
> > >>>>>>> literature and that some of the characters most dangerous to equal
> > >>>>>>> opportunity are female.
>
> > >>>>>>> On 2 Dec, 06:27, rigs<rigs...@gmail.com> wrote:
>
> > >>>>>>>> On Saturday, December 1, 2012 10:30:37 AM UTC-6, archytas wrote:
> > >>>>>>>>> The Body Class and Work Disability Discrimination Equality of
> > Opportunity Identity Politics Multiculturalism Objectification Parenthood
> > and Procreation Power Race Rape Reproduction and the Family Science The
> > Self Sex and Gender Sex Markets Trans Issues These are just some of the
> > topics I thought I could put forward in teaching gender issues in
> > management. They underlie the bland politically correct policy matters. One
> > thing has always occurred to me as missing in every debate I can remember.
> > Women are as bad as men as managers. I equate equality with hospitality
> > (always two-sided at least) and suspect we don't realise behaviour is much
> > less to do with gender or the individual than we think and perhaps has
> > little to do with rationality. I don't think we see the wood for the trees
> > on gender.
>
> > >>>>>>>> How unlike anything EVER mentioned to me as a girl or young
> > woman. I suppose we depended on family tradition, religion and etiquette as
> > we were groomed for marriage via mystery, motherhood and homemaking.
> > Groomed, indeed!- Hide quoted text -
>
> > >>>>>>> - Show quoted text -- Hide quoted text -
>
> > >>>>> - Show quoted text -- Hide quoted text -
>
> > >>> - Show quoted text -
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